A person’s self-image (the way we picture themselves) and their self-esteem (the confidence and satisfaction they have in that picture) really suffer when they abuse alcohol and drugs. No matter how distorted their self-image is, they generally believe it and act on it—and they will pick the kinds of friends they think go with their self-image.

When their self-image is twisted, they see only faults, and will have low self-esteem.
Addiction counseling helps them unravel how conditions of worth taught by their primary caregivers shaped how they valued themselves. If these primary caregivers rarely touched or held them and told them they were bad, they developed low self-esteem and sold themselves short.

Counseling and psychotherapy helps Dr. Paul Standal’s patients establish a healthy congruent sense of self, where the awareness of their destructive past behaviors help them redefine a healthier set of behaviors and values based on principles of healthy self-interest.

In counseling, Dr. Standal helps patients identify triggers, which are people, places and things that have driven the patient’s craving and need to use.

A most powerful trigger is our need for regard and acceptance from others. Recognizing that this need will make them do things that are destructive just to please or feel accepted is an important area of growth. Counseling and treatment help the person in recovery feel less alone and more self-accepting, and, as a consequence, feel more assured of independent action and in control of their actions that lead to greater self-esteem.

In counseling, Dr. Standal encourages the development of a regard complex with a new set of sober people. Though it can be awkward at first, as you move into greater sobriety, your ability to foster a congruent self-image will increase. Taking action reinforces your values and self-esteem.

Dr. Standal’s goal of recovery-focused therapy is to help his clients foster a greater sense of self-esteem. Self-esteem develops and reinforces some or all of the following positive attitudes and thinking patterns:

1. Wide range of feelings, deeply with liveliness, joy, vigor, excitement, and spontaneity
2. To expect appropriate entitlement
3. Self-activation and assertion
4. Acknowledge self-esteem
5. Ability to sooth painful feelings
6. The ability to make and stick to commitments
7. Creativity
8. Intimacy
9. Ability to be alone
10. Continuity of self
11. Life opens up to the road ahead
12. Care of personal appearance
13. Economic stability
14. Appreciation of real values
15. Rebirth of ideals
16. New interests develop
17. Commitment to family needs
18. Desire to escape goes
19. Return of self-esteem
20. New circles of stable friends
21. Family and friends appreciate and support efforts
22. Natural rest and sleep
23. Realistic thinking
24. Nourishment taken in
25. Onset of new hope
Diminishing fears of life’s unknown